How Thoughts Fuel Emotions: An Introduction to Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT)

Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy was developed by Albert Ellis and is rooted in Stoic philosophy (Ellis was, admittedly, a big fan of them). In his early work, Ellis outlined the central principle of his theoretical approach: it is largely our beliefs about events that determine how emotionally disturbed we become. Referencing Epictetus, a well-known Stoic, Ellis noted: "Men are disturbed not by things, but by the views which they take of them."

Ellis later developed the "ABC" model (later updated to ABCDE) to capture how beliefs contribute to emotional disturbance and behavioral consequences. This is worth knowing even if you're not a fan of Ellis or his theory.

An Activating Event (A) leads to our Belief (B) about that event, which produces a Consequence (C).

Think of the activating event as some kind of triggering event, the belief as our view about said event (often guided by our own philosophy or way of thinking), and the consequence as our emotional reaction and resulting behaviors.

Here's what this looks like in practice:

If we wait in line for ice cream and our favorite flavor has run out by the time we're next to order, we have a choice in how we respond. A flexible and adaptive belief might sound like: "Damn, I sure wanted that. Oh well, what else have they got?" An irrational one might sound like: "They shouldn’t run out of without putting up a sign. These guys are fucking with me. " In the first case, you're perturbed but still walk out with your second favorite scoop. In the second, you're yelling at a 16-year-old, tossing sample spoons on the floor, and landing yourself on the banned list of your favorite ice cream shop.

It's often easy for people to spot the activating event and the consequence that follows. We live in a society where people say "she made me so angry" or "I can't believe you made me feel this way." We often forget that nestled between an event and the emotional or behavioral consequences that follow, are our beliefs, which guide our response. In therapy, clinicians with an REBT slant will help clients identify rigid, extreme, or absolutist beliefs (“shoulds,” “musts,” and “awfulizing”), challenge them, and replace them with more flexible, reality-based alternatives.

If you keep one thing about REBT, remember that it's not the event which upsets us but our interpretation of it. How we think about a situation shapes how we respond.

If you're interested in learning more about REBT, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy: A Therapist's Guide by Albert Ellis and Catharine MacLaren is a great primary resource.

If you're curious about Stoicism, check out A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy by William B. Irvine.